xoxoendoh:

A leaf of cartography, an inkwell upturned… He’d stained the land, he’d blotted out the verdant life around him.

SasuSaku Month 2018, Day 4: Burn

Rating: K+

A/N: No content warnings for this fic, and I apologize for being a whopping twenty-four days late! For whatever reason, this one took forever and a half.

Jukebox: "You Are the Moon“ by The Hush Sound

FF.net link

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Sakura had been wandering through the secluded training grounds, eyes downcast; her troubling ruminations as much to blame as the glare of the sinking sun. There was something about the place that kept her coming back, something reassuring…. Ever since the start of the chunin exams, she had been unable to quiet her mind. Sleepless nights strung together, wakeful worries interwove: she couldn’t shed the net tangled about her.

And through some frayed string of fate, she found the object of her rumination that evening. She caught him in a moment of weakness, shortly after he’d fallen to Sabaku no Gaara and the beast within him, a time near the cruel anniversary of his clan’s demise.

And he was sending up flares.

The gradual transition to twilight was the perfect showcase for his fireballs, their red flames churning upward to lick at the weary sun in spite, in envy.

They were her beacon, drawing her into the trees.

Under the canopy, the woods were dense and shadowy green—just as they should be. Yet with every stride, the foliage grew more glaucous, the acerbic smell on the air strengthened, it burned…. And she began to hear the silence as she went deeper. There was no chirping, no scurrying. No cicadas humming their nightly crescendo, their exaltation of the rising moon. Not even cries warning of her intrusion. Just the sound of her footsteps and breath and the heavy quiet… Her instincts, however, beckoned her onward.

And all at once, she found his fury.

It could have been beautiful. Perhaps it was….

She saw downy dandelion parachutes suspended in spring; she saw windswept sakura petals, lilting and languid at the height of hanami….

Yet she knew she stood in summer. Her hands leapt to cover her mouth, her heart.

Fine motes cast a strange veil to compound the dusk. Tufts of ash drifted sedately, buoyant on the dense air; wispy embers, flickering orange and gold, floated along the heated murk. Below, the incinerated terrain hissed and sputtered in despairing protest.

A leaf of cartography, an inkwell upturned… He’d stained the land, he’d blotted out the verdant life around him.

The unfurling fumes thwarted her attempt at a calming breath, turning it into a muffled wheeze against her palm. Her fingers tightened at her collar, steaming with perspiration; she shook her head, repelling the flecks as they sifted down. One footfall disturbed the chalk of the forest floor; the next created a small cloud. Uneven as they were, her steps took her through the ruin, the temperature climbing as the sun fell, until she stood a few feet away from the boy she loved. The origin of the blaze…

Her tiny frame trembled faintly in the wafting grey, in the orange glow of smoldering coals. She could feel the heat of his destruction radiating into her skin. And she knew she should look him in the eyes, but she couldn’t—not when his gaze had been so blank, so hollow only moments before…. He’d just stood there, among the scattered cinders and flames, the brittle charcoal, the blackened remnants of a vernal woodland. He could have been a child witnessing his first snowfall, dazed, unable to fathom it all. He hadn’t said a word. Perhaps he’d been unable.

“S-Sasuke-kun,” Sakura began hoarsely, sure in the need to break the silence, to tell him…yet so uncertain in the method, in the phrasing. “The day we became genin…” she trailed off, unable to deny her eyes the scene around him.

The burnt foliage above had come apart at the seams, falling so bright in the maturing darkness. Spores seeking to take root, nascent sparks popped and rocketed skyward to compete with those descending from the treetops. Flurrying and whirling, they clashed. Yet it was a futile rivalry, for even fire was failing: the last of the withering flames lusted after the unburnt traces at his feet; blindly, they reached and stretched and groped the scorched earth for virgin kindling to burn, to consume….

But there’s nothing left….

The notion tugged her from her odd reverie, sent a shiver to shake her spine. She’d seen enough. Sakura bit down on her lip. The grainy dust—the arid, acrid taste of smoke and wrath—lingered on her tongue as her lips parted.

The weight of her words and the pain in the memory sucked the remaining oxygen from the haze around her, forcing her to speak too quickly: “That day, you told me solitude is the worst sort of pain! I-I see it so clearly now, Sasuke-kun! I…” She felt weighted, so heavy. Her short hair shielded her face as she hung her head lower, eyes closed to the irritants and toxins around her. “I…” she tried again, in a whisper, “I didn’t back then, I had no idea…” Her voice was stronger: “But I think, maybe now, I understand what the pain of loneliness is. I have family and friends…but…”

She tentatively lifted her head to search for his eyes in the dim. She found them, dark and distant…and waiting. Hers shone and stung with tears to be—from the intensity of his regard; from the airborne debris of the sudden gust. The sparks floating around them flared and billowed on the wind. It whipped their hair, it reanimated the once-settled charred remnants…. Watching the displaced pall subside around her still feet, she waited for the words to come.

When they did, they were frail, fraught: “You feel so far away….”

Come back to me, hung unspoken.

Recovering herself, Sakura quietly cleared her throat and took a soft step forward. She kept her tone gentle, free of judgement: “It-it breaks my heart, Sasuke-kun, seeing you…like this.”

Eyes now keen, now wary on hers, he was still panting from the exertion of forging his own inferno. Singes dotted the skin around his mouth, where he’d exhaled fire. Like hers, his inky hair was dappled. Trickles of sweat streaked through the fine layer of grey on his face, stripping away the corruption, to reveal slivers of the boy she recognized, the boy she loved. She examined the rest of him and found myriad of scorch marks. He’d been reckless. His dominant arm hung forgotten at his side, the last vestiges of electricity convulsing through his fingers. So reckless…

She clenched the fabric of her dress; she felt her skin cool and prickle, felt the tiny hairs stand on end—like his current had somehow reached her.

Burning through your chakra like this—you could have killed yourself! You could have…

Despite the chill gripping her body, a drop of her own perspiration slid from her temple to her chin. The feeling, though slight, was enough to break her train of thought. For the briefest moment, she wondered if he saw anything in the vein of clarity it left on her…. The droplet disappeared into the dust, and her mind centered.

Somehow, she knew it was time for honesty. Somehow, she knew he needed to hear it:

“Because…you mean everything to me. Everything.”

The words had nearly caught in her throat, suspended like the ash in the sweltering air. I will not cry, she told herself. I won’t weep for him. He’s never wanted that, he never will—and he deserves more than my tears.

As tentative as it was instinctual, her hand reached out for his shoulder. Eyes flitting between his and her target, she braced for an adverse reaction the moment she made contact, she expected it. Though he stiffened, he didn’t swat her away or shrink back: he just stood there and allowed her featherlike touch; watching the dust settle to further mute her bright hair, questioning her with his dubious silence.

Her eyes rose from his shoulder to scrutinize the three black tomoe etched into his neck, as they so often did, and she silently cursed the Snake. Beyond the singes, the malicious, black mark was the only blemish on his body—the only visible manifestation of his suffering! Unless, of course, he set the coal of his eyes aflame…

And she’d seen the frightening power of both.

Is that what you were thinking, Sasuke-kun? …Is that why you did this?

The fingers at the red of her collar clamped down, she moved to bite her lip again—but she stopped herself. She couldn’t give in to such a childish habit when she’d come this far, when he was listening. Determined, the verdure of her eyes returned to his.

“You don’t have to be alone, Sasuke-kun,” she spoke soothingly, careful to avoid a patronizing tone. “You’ll always have me.” As a shy smile formed around her last word, she felt blood rush to her flame-flushed cheeks. Sakura ignored the sensation and forced her lips to loosen: this wasn’t the time to give in to girlish whimsy; she’d make her body obey. She bent her elbow to step solicitously closer, close enough to smell the earthy scent she knew to be his through the miasma. One hand on him, the other on her heart, she swore: “Always.”

I love you so much…with all my heart, she thought, but I don’t think I can tell you that, not yet.

She gingerly traced his shoulder, nails collecting the fine, gritty precipitate there. She could feel the dexterity in the muscle, the power in the sinew…. And he didn’t flinch under her light touch, he didn’t avert his eyes. She moved nearer, preparing to see alarm or revulsion appear in his expression, until her forearm was flush against the length of his bicep, only a few inches of smoke separating the rest of them. She couldn’t breathe for fear of dispelling the moment, her chance to reach him….

A branch snapped behind him, coils of red outlining its remaining leaves, faux fireflies swarming and twinkling in its wake. The fallen limb rippled through the powdery soot at the forest floor, sending it aloft once more.

Yet neither noticed, their senses entirely focused on the other.

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yumikinechan:

Burn

It burns when I see him again,

Near death on the bridge of Tazuna’s bridge.

I’ve never seen a person I loved so broken and bloody before.

My body holds a mind of its own as I hold him close, trembling like a broken machine against this man I have come to love. He smells like sweat and blood.

For once in my life since meeting him I don’t think about whether he saw me as annoying or not for being beside him.

Sasuke is dying.

I never knew just how much tears a person could produce,but it feels like I produce them all.

I think of nothing but Sasuke as I cry over his dead form, wanting to avoid the needles of Haku’s wrath sticking out of his body and failing badly. I can’t stop shaking with the anger and pain weld up inside me.

I miss him even as I stare into his pale and scratched face, knowing in those moments that I will have to leave him.

I hang on anyway, I hang on in the whirlwind of incomprehensible thoughts flying through my head.

Sasuke, Sasuke,Sasuke…

I’m sorry I was so annoying, I’m sorry I wasn’t a better teammate for you, I’m so sorry…

Please come back…

Please-

“Sakura?”

I gasp, hearing Sasuke Uchiha’s voice once more. Then my eyes widen when I register his open eyes. The dark color of them are filled with surprise at my face.

I am too happy and relieved to see him again. It is like he came back from the dead just for me, but I know it isn’t like that. I know it but I don’t care. A joyous sob escapes my lips and I bury my face in his neck.

“You’re alive!”

I felt Naruto and Kakashi shuffle in behind me to get closer to Sasuke, happy to see their teammate and student alive as well.

“Ack, Sakura, I can’t breathe!”

He chokes, and I reluctantly let go of him.

As the others begin to talk to him I notice Sasuke still staring at me like it was the first time we ever met.

I can’t even feel surprise because I know that in a way for both of us, it is.

After all, this is the first time I realized how much I love Sasuke, and for him the first time he actually sees me.

The Sakura Haruno who loves him.

behindheremeraldeyes:

sasusaku month 2018

days 03 & 04— restless/ burn

title: Fever

summary: It’s the night after their tragic encounter, and the team has decided to stay at an inn for the night. Even if she was supposed to be resting, something inside of her won’t let her fall asleep. Canon-verse; set after the meeting at the Iron Bridge.

a/n: So…. I was feeling a bit angsty when I started this fic and I apologize for what you’re about to read. It’s not something happy, but it isn’t really sad either… It’s pure angst. SasuSaku brings that stuff on me, and I’m really glad I could finally explore a bit of my thoughts on what happened right after the events of the Iron Bridge. Even if it’s different from the others I usually write, I hope you can still enjoy this small one! Please, tell me what you think and how you feel about it!

Fever: an abnormally high body temperature, usually accompanied by shivering, headache, and in severe instances, delirium.

It burns in a way no flame has ever burned her skin before. It irks, throbs and her muscles painfully contract around her neck. It’s as if her entire body is being swallowed by the fire, and yet, death doesn’t come to take away the pain.

Her breathing is uneven, her clothes are soaked in sweat and her neck stings at the soft brush of the thick, chilling air that enters through the window. It’s a cold night, she knows, but not even the winter breeze seems to be enough to lower the temperature of her entire system. She can feel her hair sticking to the back of her neck, irritating even more the area which is certainly source of that harrowing heat.

She holds back her boiling tears, clutching the sheets in her hands and biting her lower lip until she can taste the iron of her own blood. Her emerald eyes remain open as she stares at the wooden ceiling of the inn’s room, fear taking over her soul and preventing her eyelids to remain closed for more than a second.

Sakura doesn’t dare close her eyes, no. She doesn’t want to be trapped in that dark inferno that resembles his cold stare so much. She saw his eyes less than 24 hours ago, and even if that used to be a dream of hers for the past 3 years, now, she’s completely terrified of them.

Those eyes… That man.

Her heart aches and her neck burns at the simple thought, and once again, the medic nin starts to feel her throat constricting with an unusual weight wrapped around it. A panic attack is building up inside her— the second of the night— and she uselessly struggles to differ reality from the nightmare she can’t really hide from.

You’re safe, she thinks, repeating it like a mantra in her head. You’re alive and so is he. Now pull yourself together!

She’s shaking in fear now, and that reaction only makes her hate herself even more, for it reminds her of her past. It reminds her of the girl she used to be, who believed being a ninja meant only that she would be able to spend her days with the coolest boy of her class.

That girl was pathetic. She was weak and too pure for the real world a ninja has to face. Always worrying about futile things and never really having to sacrifice much to cross her obstacles, that girl had no idea of the harsh reality that awaited for her.

She didn’t know the real meaning of loving someone. And tonight, once again, Sakura was paying the price for that ignorance.

“ Fuck.” A deep curse escapes her lips, and the pinkette finally decides that lying in bed like that won’t really help her calm down. Slowly, then, she rolls to the side, sitting up as both of her feet are touching the hard, wooden floor. She rests her elbows on her knees, her bangs falling forward as she lowers her head, and it’s only after she sighs, defeatedly, that the medic nin stands up. Quickly, she spares a glance at the night sky through the open window, hopping— begging— not to see any traces of red in between those trees. She stumbles her way towards the small bathroom, and once there, her fingers hesitate a bit before turning on the lights. Sakura isn’t sure if turning them on will be a good idea, but eventually, she does, blinding her at first before her eyes can finally settle.

And once they do, her heart sinks a little deeper.

As she stares at the woman in the mirror, Sakura finds that it’s still hard to believe that all of those colors are, indeed, painting her body. She swallows hard, lifting her right hand to her neck, and this time, sad tears manage to run down her face.

It burns, she thinks, still not able to take her eyes away from her own reflex. For it’s been over 8 hours since their encounter, the colors have already settled around her skin, an ugly mix of purple and red outlining the one mark that will forever haunt her thoughts.

There’s a hand there. His hand, with all of his fingers encircling her neck and preventing her from breathing. Even if her brain knows that she is safe right now, Sakura can still feel the same, burning pressure that crushed her throat earlier today. He was strangling her with all his strength, and in his eyes, she saw no mercy or regret. In his eyes, there was a burning flame that was going to swallow her alive, the heat from his soul scaring the life out of her. He was going to kill her. That man was going to kill her in the same way she tried to kill whatever remained of the one she was supposed to bring home.

The thought of her actions makes her fingers curl into a tight fist, and she can feel her nails piercing through the skin of her palm. Sakura actually thought she was doing the right thing but only now she can see how selfish and naive she was for actually believing she could do that.

She couldn’t kill Sasuke. Pff she was never a match for him and she will never be. He’s an excellent shinobi, with an amazing power and no emotional strings to hold him back. More than anyone, she should’ve known that she could never suppress her feelings for him and prioritize her mission. She’s been in love with him for too long already, and she doesn’t have enough power to shut him out of her life.

No. She could never kill him. Sakura could never kill the man she loves, and now, the ghost of the boy he used to be will forever haunt her dreams.

She’s feeling dirty now. Ashamed. And yet, in the midst of that fire taking over her core, her heart feels cold in a somewhat relieving way. Even if it still hurts and even if it’s broken into millions of pieces, it doesn’t burn, and right now, this is the only thing she can hold onto.

Right now, it’s the only thing keeping her sane, and in the future, she hopes, it will have to be enough to bring her back.

Her eyes close in a heavy way, and she finally decides to splash some water on her face. A temporary cool sensation takes over her cheeks, but soon, the temperature rises again. She runs her soaked fingers through her pink locks, leaning forward against the sink and watching as the drops fall from her face. The silence of the dawn fills her ears, and if anything, she finds it incredibly comforting that her suffering isn’t loud enough to make any difference out there.

She doesn’t want to bother the others with her own problems. She doesn’t want to be the weakling again and to burden Naruto with things she was supposed to solve by herself. God knows she’s done enough already, and from now on, Sakura needs to at least seem stronger than she actually is.

No more crying in front of the others. No more hesitating, and certainly, no more hiding.

You are a ninja, for fuck’s sake! Her eyes are glaring at her own reflexion now, not ignoring her bruises anymore. Even if she wants to cry and hide those colors behind withe bandages, the Haruno girl refuses to do so, for she needs to face the reality of her own actions.

Those bruises are real. They were given to her by the love of her life, and now, they belong to her.

And just like his coldness froze her heart before, Sakura will let his harshness burn her alive if she has to, but she will face it all as a warrior should. She will carry that lump on her throat every time she has to lie about being okay, and she will ignore the pain in her chest whenever his eyes come back to haunt her dreams.

She will be stronger. Not tonight, but eventually, she will.

She will forget him, but never the one he used to be; and she will still fight to bring him back, for her best friend can’t do it all alone.

Uciha Sasuke is also a burden she has to carry. He’s a sin that corrupts her heart, and unless she purifies him, there’s no turning back on the path she once chose to follow.

Sakura can’t stop loving him. Not even if she wants to— not even right now. It’s pathetic and incredibly painful to love a man like that, but it’s the only thing left from the time when they were all happy. She can’t give up on that feeling, no. In order to preserve the one thing that has always been with her even when nothing else was, she can’t give up on that feeling.

And as she heads back to the room, her emerald eyes don’t bother to glance towards the window. She sits on the edge of the bed, that annoying silence still mocking her ears, and she hopes that, at least for now, the words— the excuses— she’s just told herself will be enough to help her through the night.

Tonight, she hopes these lies will fool her. And tomorrow, she hopes they can become her truth.

mimi-love-4ever:

SasuSaku Month 2018 – Day 4: Burn
Rating: T
Context: A little non-compliant.
A/N: This is a continuation of Day 3 (and part 2). Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy it!

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“I still can’t believe you’re back, teme!” Naruto clapped him on the back excitedly. “You’ve missed so much!”

After another meeting with Kakashi regarding his reinstatement as a full Konoha shinobi, Naruto insisted he come along and train with the rest of Team 7. An offer Kakashi insisted he shouldn’t pass up so now he was being dragged away by the blond jinchuriki and his motor mouth. Something’s never changed. As they walked by, people openly stared and whispered about his return. It used to bother him but now he was able to ignore them, except for the occasional giggling he knew was directed at him. That, that did bother him.

“So is it true?” Naruto asked, snapping him out of his thoughts.

“What?” He took one look at Naruto’s wide, smiling face and narrowed his eyes.

“That you’re staying with Sa-ku-ra-chan?”

He had half a mind to knock the smile right off his whiskered face. He could literally see the indecent thoughts rolling around in that empty brain of his and while Naruto knowing of his sleeping arrangements hardly bothered him, the way he said it was another story. He wanted Sakura, but he certainly wasn’t about to announce his intentions to the whole nosy village. One nosy blonde was enough.

“Aa,” he replied shortly and began to walk faster towards the training ground, leaving said nosy blonde behind with a semi shocked expression and mouth open.

“Well good,” Naruto surprised him by saying as soon as he caught up. “She works too much and barely takes care of herself, perhaps a roommate will be good for her. An actual good roommate.”

That last remark bothered him.

“You sound like she’s had a lot of roommates,” he retorted.

Naruto shrugged. “A couple. They were all assholes, honestly.”

He frowned. The thought of Sakura living with another person – man – made him uncomfortable. No, not uncomfortable; jealous. It made him jealous. The realization stumped him for he had never felt jealousy quite like this. A deep, possessive feeling nestled at the pit of his stomach that made him curse any man who came within proximity of the pink-haired beauty. He shook those thoughts away as they reached the training grounds. Naruto quickly made his way over to a figure sitting under a tree, drawing it seemed.

Sai, he remembered his name to be. The one who had replaced him in Team 7 after he defected.

“Hey Sai!” Naruto grinned. “Is Yamato-taichou coming?”

“Hello Dickless,” Sai greeted Naruto. “I do believe he is coming later.”

Naruto grumbled at the nickname. “Fine, what about Sakura-chan?”

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yangssunglasses:

SSM 2018 Day 4: Burn

Available on FFnet

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The Fire Between Them

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1.

Don’t play with the fire, they said.

Sakura didn’t listen. She had a selective
hearing like that when it came to ninja rules. She could recite them backwards
without a single stammer, but abiding them was another story.

When Team Seven was making camp, everyone
had their assigned tasks to complete. Sakura usually gathered the firewood,
then she and Sasuke arranged it together and he lit the fire. She was utterly
fascinated with his every gesture as he made the correct handseals, took in a
gulp of breath and released it with a moderate flame and a puff of smoke. There
was something reverent and contemplative in the way Sasuke looked then, as if
he was performing a sacred ritual only he knew about. It was entirely possible
with him being the last of his clan, but Sakura wouldn’t ask, too afraid to
bring up bad memories for him just to satisfy her petty curiosity.

Nevertheless, she loved to watch him when he
started the fire. He stood over it like a guardian deity, a thoughtful frown on
his handsome features. The warm orange glow cast on his face made him look as
if he was also made from the flames. A being of pure fire couldn’t be burned,
no matter how close he stood to the blaze.

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